As divorce attorneys, we are devoted to helping clients better understand what steps they need to take to get through their divorce in the best emotional and financial shape as possible.
We're going to change things up a bit and look at some things that spouses should AVOID while in the middle of a divorce. Individually, each one of these mistakes could derail the efforts of even the most skilled divorce team. Read on so you can avoid making these common mistakes in your divorce!
1. Leaving a digital trail. Every type of electronic communication, be it text messages, email or Facebook has the potential to leave a digital trail. That means that your tweets, Facebook posts, and text messages could end up under a microscope, and painfully scrutinized by your spouse's divorce team in hopes of destroying your credibility.
Should you swear off texting and Facebook during your divorce? Not necessarily, just remember that anything you do via electronic communications has to be something that can't be used as ammunition against you.
2. Making mistakes on Facebook. You have to be aware that social medial sites, particularly Facebook play a major role in today's divorces. Beware: status updates, profile pages, comments, and questionable photos can all be used as evidence to contradict a spouse's statements to prove drug and alcohol use, infidelity, dissipating of marital assets, and emotional instability.
3. Dating during a divorce. Divorce can be stressful and lonely, but it's not wise to turn to a new boyfriend or girlfriend to help you cope. While California is technically a no fault divorce state, dating before your divorce is final could lead to questions over adultery, child custody, and wasting community property on the new sweetheart.
Also, dating can lead to pregnancy, which can delay the divorce until paternity is established. If you've met someone special and really want to date while you're in the process of divorcing, please consult with an attorney who can help you understand how to proceed with caution.
4. Spying on your spouse. During divorce, it can be hard to resist the urge to snoop into your spouse's belongings and affairs, especially if you suspect adultery, but be careful. Before you unintentionally do something that's illegal, be sure to learn about what is and isn't allowed in California. After all, you need to be vigilant because for all you know your spouse could be spying on you.
5. Going on a spending spree. Sometimes when going through a divorce, nothing makes you feel better than taking a nice vacation, buying a new toy (if you're a guy), or going on a shopping spree, but please, if you're going through a divorce resist the urge to make unnecessary purchases.
This is not the time to add to your debt load or "get back" at your spouse by dissipating (wasting) marital assets. This is the time when you need to think rationally, not emotionally.